What I have been reading...

Having all this time is both a blessing and a curse, isn't? Those of us who are lucky enough to work and home aren't feeling the financial strain as badly, but there are still conflicting emotions to work through and face each day.

I will tell you this blog contains affiliate links from Amazon.

Sometimes I feel like this is just an extended weekend, and other times I feel like I have been living this forever.

First and foremost, getting paid to stay home with my family is my dream come true. However, it isn't quite like I had planned it. First of all, I do have at least a couple hours of paperwork, grading, and phone calls to do every day. As a special education high school teacher my grading load might be lighter, but IEP and evaluations still have to be completed one way or another, if possible. And it's all good. I love being home. What surprises me though, is how little energy I have left for my family. Someone told my husband, he was lucky, his wife was a teacher, as if teaching my own would somehow be easy. And the answer is, "Nope." If my first grader doesn't want to practice reading (and he is learning slowly) he will throw a pillow across the room, do a karate chop kick jump, while screaming, "No." My fourth grader lives to learn-but only what he wants to learn. Science facts and experiments. Anything else is a struggle. Which sucks, because he is going to need those math skills to advance far in science. Throw in a three-year-old (and folks, my kids have ENERGY, fire and vim (wonder where they get that)), and it makes for a long day.
So yes, I have everything I want temporarily, and no, it isn't quite as I had imagined.

But between working on work stuff, blog stuff, business stuff, and family stuff, I have been trying to read as much as possible. So here are my recents reads, affiliate links, and opinions!

The Career Code This book is subtitled Must-Know Rules for a Strategic, Stylish,and Self-Made Career, and includes 27 Life Hacks Every Woman Should Master!

Combining fashion and career advice, this book would be perfect for the new graduate just starting her career! I love fashion advice, and the career advice would have been useful to me years ago, before I made a bazillion mistakes, not understanding the cardinal rule, it's who you know, not what you know. Actually, I sort of suspected that, but couldn't figure how to get to know who you needed to know, you know? Introvert failings and all. It still was a fun book to read, and I highly recommend it to the 20-something gal.

In answer to that question how you get to know who you need to know, this next book just sort of has it.

Compelling People: The Hidden Qualities that Make Us Influential

It is so good. It really takes all the stuff your gut kind of knows, throws a little research behind it, and throws it back in your face in a palatable way.







This Kindle book is just fantastic. I am only about halfway through and I have learned so much. From explaining stereotypes and how they affect us all (it helps to be white, male, and attractive), to giving real advice on how to feel and exude more power, I am treasuring this book. This book acknowledges that some people have an advantage, but (so far) I am appreciative of the helpful advice that is given to those who aren't from a most privileged spot. The main idea of this book is that influence comes from both strength and warmth. It is important to have the right balance of strength (power to get things done) and warmth (overall likeability). This balance differs depending on who you are. Men can get away with exuding more strength, but women who show too much strength run the risk of being labelled a bitch and disregarded. Too much warmth though will have you disregarded as sweet, but ineffectual. It addresses how to get the balance right in order to  boost your level of influence.

Back in the fluff department I am flipping through

Parisian Chic Look Book: What Should I Wear Today?

I got this book from the library, but it is a book which simply BEGS to be owned. With its gold foild color and its fabulous color photos of classic pieces of clothing and how to put the pieces together for certain occasions including the ubiquitous "From Office to NightClub" all the way to "At the Courthouse for my Divorce,"  it will become a classic on your fashion/self help shelf for sure!

Now we get into my latest interest, Manifestation and The Law of Attraction. This is a whole new can of worms, which I plan to do more posts on, both bookwise and discuss my passions and conflicts with the light movement, but I have just worked through these books, so I wanted to add them here.

The Magic Path of Intuition

A quick and simple read, you will find yourself refreshed and hopeful after completing this read. The stories are simple and straightforward, and it makes for a nice read sitting in the backyard watching the kids play in the sunshine.

Liquid Luck: The Good Fortune Handbook

This kindle edition is fairly short, positive, and upbeat. It is all about recognizing with gratitude the abundance which already surrounds you. I am only about halfway through. Although I haven't found anything that can't be found elsewhere, if you want an introduction or referesher into abundant living, this book would be fun to read.


The Tapping Solution for Manifesting Your Greatest Self

So here is what I have discovered. At this point, tapping is not for me. Now I can throw my hands up, thumbs pointed toward myself with Gabby Bernstein on Youtube, but I can't quite bring myself to tap through my anxiety. It's NOT a BAD idea. In fact, I think for many people it might be a fantastic way to get control of anxiety so they can move from the shadow to the light. But my anxiety is highly caffeine driven and sitting still tapping my body isn't my thing right now. I will keep it in mind for when I become a little more peaceful and still.The OTHER information in the book is absolutely useful.


Fiction

Now on to fiction. I have managed to get a little fiction reading in!

In the Dark, Dark Wood

Now I read this book on the kindle app on myphone, but I think fiction is best tasted with paper.

At first I felt a bit of embarrassement reading this. I guess I am a bit of a book snob, and nothing here was calling out literary genius. But I got hooked on the book anyway, pulled in by average characters who just seemed kind of cool and trying to figure out whodunnit. I do think it was predictable, but just seeing how it all unfolded made for a lot of fun. I couldn't put it down!

In An Instant

This young adult book was not what I thought! I guess I didn't carefully read the summary first, but it took a turn fast, and I was along for the ride watching it all unfold. There were characters who angered me: those who were selfish, and those who were judgemental of the selfish people. I felt Mo's character was just a bit too perfect and idealized, but overall, the book had me caring about a tidy ending and truly loving the character Chloe. It was fun to watch this family, whose real balance lay in a strong mother, fight and struggle as they grieved and learned to love again.


If you are going Corono-Crazy or just want to try something outside your comfort zone, I recommend these books. Time is a blessing and let's make the most of it.

Book Review ~ Bliss Happens

Photo by Francisco Delgado on Unsplash

This blog contains affiliate links for the kindle version of the book in review. I use the kindle app on my phone and love it!

I was perusing the library for some, "Oh my goodness, they are about to shut down the town" reading books last month, when I came across the book Bliss Happens by Kym Douglas. The subtitle was "the six-week plan to a happier, prettier, thinner, and richer life!"

Now I love a serious book, but I am in no way opposed to fun and light reading, especially when it promises so much! When I finally dug into it. I was hooked. I quickly read through the book in one day.

Kym's writing style is so girl-next-door friendly you will find yourself loving her in spite of any jealous, catty tendencies you  might have simmering under the surface. She may have been kissed by the good luck star (is that a thing?), but if her real-life persona is anything like her book personality, she probably earned it. She is just so fun! 

The book starts out with  a quiz to determine how blissful you are, then breaks off into other parts which include: Beauty Bliss, Living Bliss, and the 30-Day Bliss plan. I quickly tried out some of the beauty ideas which included brushing my teeth with strawberries and smearing lemon slices along my arms to lighten the  age spots, um freckles. Now I can't remember if I read that in the book or if I was just finishing my morning hot water with lemon and found myself overcome with inspiration on natural treatments, but it was fun. It gave my arms a taut feeling for several hours, which I enjoyed, and I tasted sweet and sour, too!

Her life and momming advice was sensible. The food plan sounded delicous and if I stuck to it, I am sure the pounds would melt away. I didn't go through the day-by-day plan yet, but it seems reasonable, and honestly, I adored the alternative exercise ideas such as walking the dog, giving your parner a massage, and having a living room dance party. Really, if you can't follow this exercise plan, you probably aren't even trying.

The only caveat I found was her suggested at ditching coffee for her minty lime drink in the morning. I am just not there yet. I am not sure I ever want to be there, but the drink itself sounds like a treat!

If you are sitting around with only the grocery store pickup as occasional comfort I suggest following the affiliate link above, snatching the book to read on a free Kindle app, and planning out some homemade beauty bliss!

Creating a Mood Board

Mood Board:

Have you ever created a mood board? Today as I was working on improving this blog, I ran across fantastic opportunity to work on creating a mood board for free through BrackenHouse Branding.
It was simple and fun. This free intro opportunity leads the creator through five days of contemplation, in order to determine the mood and feel the creator would like for his or her website.

Mood boards are not only useful for website design and branding, they can be useful in decorating and even just creating inspirational goals for living when you aren't quite sure which direction you are heading. For example, if you know you want more out of life, pull up a pinterest site or grab some magazines if you are retro, and snip and clip and pin away. Over time color and image themes will begin to unfold before your eyes. Maybe you are all about the turquoise and gold this week, in anticipation of summers at the beach! Maybe you find yourself pinning quotes about finding a new job in mail delivery. Whatever it is, mood boards are great way to get in touch with what you are feeling through color and image.

Of course, I have the patience of the bunny rabbit, so I rushed through all five days at once and created my template. This tutorial discusses color theory and how one can use color influence readers and buyers. There are several more steps, but I quickly just made my moodboard, because that is how I roll. Some of the quotes are off center, which trust  me, drives me crazy, but overall, I love the
hopeful, cozy, romantic feeling of my board.

So without further adieu, here is my board:

This is the overall feeling I hope this blog is able to convey and capture this spring. I want this place to be inspirational and dreamy and full of hope of more and better.



If you want to just jump in here is a fantastic tutorial by Holly Homebody on  Youtube!
How to Design Your Own Mood Board if Your not a Designer

Perhaps you want to play with a color theme for the downstairs powder room. Whatever your plan adding a mood board can be a great way to get in touch with your creative side in an accessible and fun way!

Enjoy expressing yourself!

Jillian

Don't forget to check out our kids' clothing shop! 

lillemondrop.net

My Worst Job Interviews Ever

Photo by Amy Hirschi on Unsplash

Let me start off by saying when you are not a natural public speaker and you struggle with self-esteem, interviews can be a killer. I have watched more outgoing and less qualified people talk their way into jobs that those who knew them knew they were NEVER going to keep, while I was getting turned down by Waffle House and KFC. It was so frustrating!

So without further ado here goes:

1. Kentucky Fried Screw-Up- It was November of my junior year and my mom was pushing me to get a job. Now, I was about the shyest thing since baby Bambi, so it was pretty traumatic. "Just say you are looking for holiday work. Everyone needs to hire more people for the holidays," my much more outgoing mom told me. Embarrassed I dressed up (because Mom) and headed into nearby fastfood restaurants to apply.
I filled out the application at Kentucky Fried Chicken and the manager behind the counter asked what I was looking for. "Um, holiday work?" saying what my mom had told me. The assistant manager chuckled and said, "We don't hire for that." Meanwhile a boy from my year at school was working and I wanted to crawl under a rock and die.

2. Waffle House. I had waitressing experience and yet somehow I could not get hired at the Waffle House. I don't really remember the details other than the north side one interviewed me and suggested I try the one a few miles away. The south side one stuck her nose in the air and made it clear I wasn't what they were looking for. Too old? I was 27. Too young? I don't know. Too fat? I was about 145. Not chatty enough? Most likely.

3. Division of Family Services-Senior division. I was sitting on a psychology degree, not really relishing the idea of getting a masters. I had been in a few master's programs because the ultimate goal for anyone who loved college was to become a professor, right?, but nothing was really calling out to me enough to put that much work into it, and whenever I tried science (the Master's of Geosciences was calling to me), my self-esteem issues got in the way.  I decided to try being a social service worker. I went into the interview so nervous. I was literally sweating all over the place. My hands sweating were a given, this was prior to learning how to stop the hand sweat. However, I had sweat dripping down my back, across my upper lip-it was awful. They actually told me to just relax. I didn't get the job shockingly. They were super nice, though.

4. Another social servicy job. This was at the food stamp office. I had some doubts about the interview time, as I was excited and nervous when they called, but I was too embarrassed to call back so I thought it through and thought I had it right. I went to the interview and they called me up. They asked me questions and talked about what a responsible, organized, and punctual person was, how I kept track of records by writing things down, and juggling appointment times would be not trouble. Then one lady cocked her head to the side and asked,  Why then, had I been ten minutes late to the interview? I was mortified.
They didn't hire me and I am glad. I would have been good at it and trapped in it forever most likely.

5. A teaching job.  I had been working at Greenfield which, while I loved the little kids, wasn't quite what I wanted long term.  It was literally an hour's drive each way.
I was interviewing for a school district which was only 30 minutes away. It was a science position and I felt reasonably confident in by ability to handle middle school science. In the middle of the interview, the principal looked me in the eye and said, "Define loyalty." She was so hostile about it I knew I was trapped. She wanted someone who would stick out the position for several years, I think. Fair enough. But her hostility had me tongue-tied. Clearly I was interviewing for this position from another school (and people do this all the time. People change jobs and look for something closer to their calling ALL THE TIME. IT IS OKAY). The other interviewers looked embarrassed and looked down at the table. And I knew, I sure as heck did NOT want to work at that school. The position was open again the next year, by the way.



Those were my worst interviews. I am sure there are other moments I may have forgotten, like the time I interviewed for a seventh grade social studies job that I REALLLLLLLY wanted and said, "Y'all" when when answering a question.

Or the time when an assistant principal called me to set up a phone interview for a time I had had tickets for over a month to see a movie with my daughters. I didn't handle it well, and then mortified called her back and left a message to go ahead and do it. I sat in the summer-hot car in a parking garage outside the theatre with the windows rolled up in fear of getting robbed. I was definitely sweating. I did get the job, but I don't think I was their first choice.

Well...they say it is good to get uncomfortable and step outside your comfort zone. Noone can argue I haven't done that, right? And I think all these embarrassing moments and all these mistakes are just an indicator to not give up. Go on your interviews, answer their questions thoughtfully, and then adjust your answers accordingly at the next interview. At first this may seem dishonest, but it really isn't. Just as I was unwilling to promise I would stay at a school a certain amount of time (beyond the contract), I also found the the act of changing my answers also changed how I viewed the job and approached the question. For example, if I said I was perfectly comfortable calling parents, well, then I was making phone calls to parents without complaint. If I said the office was a last resort, then I was promising the office would be a last resort. Changing your answers to fit the interview isn't really a lie. It is a learning experience about what the job expectations were and your willingess to meet those expectations.


Man, if I didn't believe in growth mindset before, I sure do now!

Enjoy learning!

Jillian

Don't forget to check out our kids' clothing shop! 

lillemondrop.net

Quarantine Fashionista

My day job consists of going out to work every day dressed in some form of apparel. Every few years the boss will share some tips to help us dress in appropriate clothing. Usually there is something funny like shoes with bows or Mary Janes. But overall, what I take away from it, is no jeans except for Friday and "special" days, and probably no sneakers. I have noticed a lot of people wearing sneakers anyway, and I sort of get it (I do it, too). I mean we are walking all over the place, standing up a lot, comfort matters.

For me this could be anything from dress pants and skirts with a blouse or sweater to leggings and a tunic top and a pair of boots. If I wear a blazer, I try to save it for dress-down jeans Friday because who wants to look too stuffy?

Suddenly now though, I find myself in this new and exciting world of working at home (and I sort of love it!). So I thought I would share a few of my favorite pieces which get me through the week:
This post contains affiliate links.

Pajama Chic!

Photo by Chase Fade on Unsplash

Pajama chic is PERFECT for the morning after an anxiety-induced sleepless night worrying over bills, whether your job will survive, loss of FREEEEEEEEDOOOOOMMMMM (thank you, Mel), and you know, whether you and your kids are going to end up "living in a van down by the river" picking grubworms to eat for lunch.
If there is a chance a neighbor will knock or an older child might drop by, you might want to go ahead and throw your favorite sports bra on, because these tops tend to be very thin.
Something like this should be just about right...

Joggers!

Photo by Andrei Mike on Unsplash

When you are feeling a little better about things and think you might even get a little laundry folding in between online assignments and report writing, these are the pants. You can even make that panic trip to Walgreen's in them, if you find you are out of a staple like milk or bread.

Zoom Meeting Dress Shirt:

Time for your weekly Zoom meeting? Dress it up, girl! This shirt has you covered from the waist up (just don't forget and stand up to yell at your kids to GO Watch TV NOW! unless you take the time to at least throw a pair of jeans on, too (I kid, I have a 9 year old, no more pantless days for me).

Photo by Bibarys Ibatolla on Unsplash

Evening Time
Finally get those rascals in bed? Or maybe you just gave up and handed them a tablet and sent them to their rooms?
It's wine time, pretty momma! Relax in style in a simple flowy tank dress like this:

 

Photo by Jonathan Borba on Unsplash

Not only slouchy and sexy, but it hides that Covid 19 y'all better be putting on, too, so I am the not the only one who emerges from this with a greater resemblance to Jabba the Hut! Solidarity Sisters!

Now you have some simple styles to get you through these long weeks in style! Stay tuned for hairstyles next week!


Enjoy dressing,

Jillian

Don't forget to check out our kids' clothing shop! 

lillemondrop.net

Handling it, but not as well as I could

Photo by Alisa Anton on Unsplash

It has been about a month since our Disney trip was cancelled/postponed and stores began slowly closing. A month of uncertainty, a little fear, a lot of anxiety, and the ever-encroaching boredom gnawing at my brain.

The thing is, I love to work. As much lip service as  I pay to being home, I like to be actively doing something with my head, working on something, finishing something, creating something. And here I am feeling like this big "SUCK" has latched onto my brain, and is sucking out the light and blowing in the darkness. The idea of not going back to work until August is really hard to hold on to.

Just lots of disappointment all around. And it's not just me, I know. The fact that everyone else is feeling the stress brings a feeling of solidarity. The extreme sleepiness bothers me, but I apparently this is a much larger stress to our mind than we might realize.

So what to do?
Well, I am still working on the 50-walk challenge. It's a little hard to get motivated when day after day is dreary and chill, but once I head out the door and walk, I never regret it. I am well on track with that goal.

I am slowly working on a much needed cupboard and cabinet cleanout. The struggle with that sort of cleaning is there is always a crazy mess right in the middle. But I am getting there. I want to paint, but I am embarrassed about getting paint. I feel like someone is going to stop, point me out, Invasion of the Body Snatchers style, and scream, "NOT AN ESSENTIAL PURCHASE!" But my keeping myself emotionally healthy and busy is essential, too. So maybe I will grab a daughter for moral support and head up and get paint. Are they still mixing paint? I guess I could call.

If I, as an ultra-introvert, am suffering, how are the extraverts handling this? How many people are REALLY following the guidelines and how many are pretending, too, but breaking little rules here and there? I am curious.

Anyway, goals are important, so I plan to get from 10 books read on my reading challenge to 15 books by the end of April. I plan to paint my three-year- old's room. I plan to organize all the kitchen cupboards. I do have some paperwork for work which will take up a chunk of time. Maybe I will just go through it r e a l l y  s l o w l y to stretch out the time it takes. If I am working a lot, I will appreciate the downtime more.

The jury is out on gardening. If I don't have summer school, I will have enough time to do a great vegetable garden, but I am sort of sick of the mess. I am leaning towards just throwing out grass seed and having a green lawn.

Eventually, I will pretty these thoughts up, put a lovely filter over them, adjust the lens, and make them into something else. But for a little while longer, I am just going to feel the reality.


We've got this, right?
Jillian

Don't forget to check out our kids' clothing shop! 

lillemondrop.net

The Dichotomy of Personal Choice

Photo by Jon Tyson on Unsplash

Recently I was super-excited to find a cheap online learning course regarding living a life with poise. I happen to like this author, most of the time, so I was excited to get a little more lifestyle reading in. But even as I signed up for the cheap course (which lets face it-nothing is new-it's always just a refresher of what's already been mind-consumed), I felt the pull against poise. The pull towards authentic honesty.

There are two different camps. The camp of elegance, poise, and a bit of polite mystery stand tall on one side. Meanwhile, the pull towards authenticity, honesty, and transparency rises on the other. True, there may be some who can straddle both camps, but I think that's rare. And I find myself being pulled back and forth. I feel as if I should be on the poise side-the senator's wife is how I would describe it. Cultivating an aura of warmth, while revealing nothing, living the beautiful life and striving towards greater beauty would be paramount in this lifestyle.
On the other hand, I have always feared I would be put in the dreaded Candor group in Divergent, with a pull towards openness and honesty. I want to drag people into my crazy, into my mess, and show them,"Hey, it's all okay."

I see people around me falling into these two camps. There are people on Facebook who only show the lovely parts, who never speak of sick relatives and rarely share photos. Everything they post appears so carefully planned to present an image which helps them climb the ladder of their ambition.
And then there are the real people, the open and honest people, who tell it like it is. And I think these are the people I like more. But of course, there has to be a balance. Feelings change on a breeze, a new thoughts changes the perspective, and creates an all-new terrain frequently. If you always tell it like it is, you'll be a in a mess. I like people who are open about peeing their pants on a date, who ask people for sympathy when loved ones are ill, and who admit when their spouse is being a butt.
But then I read the poise side, and I wonder if maybe they are right. The world certainly rewards them more.

And as someone with a growth mindset, because I too am a product of this environment, I want to be improve and become more and better. I just wonder which way more and better is. Obviously, this is a case of wanting to have my cake and eat it, too. I want to say what I think, have people care, but at the same I want people to take it with a grain of salt and not care. Impossible. Ideally, I would become one of those lucky few who straddle both camps. But who is to be my guide, when I don't know any of those people? Who is to show me where the line is, so I can push it just a little bit, without hopping off the edge?

I was talking to a relative a year or two ago, about my blog just not picking up the readers like I wanted it to. This person suggested I limit the amount of personal introspection and boil it down to a lesson to give people advice on how to better their own life. This leads to doubt and stilted writing as I feel I always have to have a point. Maybe I just need to go with my gut and write what I feel and if noone follows, noone follows. Not having followers and loyal readers though, when I have the urge to write, makes me feel as if I getting it wrong. Writing with authenticity is a matter of laying one's soul bare-or rather pieces of one's soul because if one were totally honest-well, it wouldn't be pretty-and it is raw and difficult. And to not be followed can lead to a such a flushed, hot feeling of embarrassment and shame.

And then I remind myself of all the times I was quiet, and I think a life not expressed is a life not really lived.